Gems From Heaven

Yesterday was Kendra's first counseling appointment.  After filling out the paperwork I realized Kendra would be very mild compared to most kids that go there.  I wondered if she really needed some therapy but after her appointment her counselor told us that she is anxious.  She has a lot of fears about various things and we hope we can figure them out and help her.

The waiting room is super fun with a couch and magazines for adults and a play area for kids.  Megan had a great time while she waited for her sister.  One parent/guardian had gone back to talk to the counselor before the child did.  The kid took off, and when the parent/guardian came back out her eyes were red and tearful.  About a half hour later someone called the parent/guardian and I heard her say, "she stabbed me with a pen!"  I guess there was a fight and the kid stabbed her arm.  Then another little girl arrived early with her caretaker.  She chatted with the wounded parent/guardian about the little girl and why she was attending the counseling facility.  Something to do with her father.  It broke my heart to see this little girl shut down as she was talked about.  I mean, literally her head sank, her eyes faced the floor, it was just so sad.  I think another young girl about Kendra's age was there for behavioral issues.  After our appointment I began calling my girls "gems from heaven."  They have their issues and have put me on the brink of insanity, but my goodness, they are so sweet and fun and literally, "gems from heaven."

It's Done!

Mark's proud moment:

 The chicken coop is done!  And what a beauty it is!

 

 Inside you see Mark's engineering skills - nesting boxes, roosting bars, and a door that opens for easy cleaning.  On the outside of the nesting boxes another door opens for easy egg gathering.  There is a window on the side that can open for more ventilation during the summer or remain closed during cold winter months. 

 

 Kendra was scared of the chicks so she stayed behind me so they wouldn't fly on her.

 

 Mark was happy when a chick found the ramp.  Look how friendly that Barred Plymouth Rock is.  It's my favorite chicken.  She just stood there while Megan pet and squished her.

I love how comfortable Meg is with our family pets.

 

Life Is Like A Chair Of Bowlies

It's actually been an exhausting week.  It began last week when I went to see a counselor for Kendra for her anxiety.  I had to fill out a ton of paperwork (I was there for about 45 minutes) on our family history.  Then at my doctor appointment I learned my blood tested positive for downs, which really didn't bother me but my doctor was concerned.  So he sent my paperwork to a perinatal doctor for an ultrasound and amniocentesis if I so chose.  The next day they called me and asked if I could come in on Monday.  Why was everyone so anxious and concerned when I wasn't?  Once again I had to fill out a ton of paperwork about family history and genes.

This week Mark and I met with Kendra's counselor and went over everything I had already written and then some.  Then, the next day we met with a genetic counselor and again went over everything I had filled out in more depth.  After those two meetings I realized that Mark and I should never have had children!!!  Basically this is what happens - long ago something traumatic happens to someone in your family line, it then gets passed on to the next person in line, who has their own traumatic experiences to add to it and so on and so forth.  So by the time it gets to me I am a complete twisted mess and shouldn't pass any of it on!  I get it now!  Thankyou!  This pregnancy has been hard on me and I've told Mark that it is my last.  And now, after meeting with a psychologist and a genetic counselor, it sealed the deal for me. 

I've never seen a perinatologist but after talking with the genetic counselor we had an ultrasound that focused on the heart and blood flow, then the doctor came in and took his turn, then I had to meet with another doctor.  It took forever and I was happy, so happy to leave.  Even though baby looks fine it was just an emotionally exhausting day.  So now I am "high risk" and get to go back every month.  Boo. 

Truly the most concerning thing for me is my weight gain.  I gained 1 1/2 pounds in the last week!  How is this possible?  I don't mind gaining 30 even 40 pounds, but I'm well on my way to a 50-60 pound weight gain.  Yipers!

Why It's Better In Your Twenties

I have just decided that all those people who get married young and have babies right off know what they're doing.  I've said that I'm too old to be having kids.  I'm just too old.  I'm in my thirties now.  My greatest concern during this pregnancy has been my weight gain.  I don't know how I gained so much weight when I had morning sickness.  Now that I feel better I can drink a smoothie every morning like I use to.  Granted I am much more tired so I don't jog like I did before pregnancy, but I still try to be somewhat healthy.  I can't stop gaining weight!  I mean, lots of weight!  I am 3 pounds shy of my total weight gain I had with Megan, and I still have 20 weeks left to go!  Now my goal is to gain no more than 1 pound a week.  I'd be happy with 1 pound a week.  My doctor is not concerned, but probably because it's all I talk about at my visits.  I told Mark that I'm going to be a bulimic pregnant woman (I was kidding - I hate puking, could never do it.)  I don't have a picture of my size, I haven't taken any this time around.  But this is basically what I look like...or feel I look like:

CAUTION: Picture of my bare belly:

Yeah, I was 9 months pregnant with Kendra at that time.  Oh blessed twenties.

Baby Chicks

A few weeks ago we bought 3 day old baby chicks.  We bought two plymouth barred rocks, two rhode island reds, and one americana.  I wanted chickens that would be good in all weather, good egg layers, and friendly so the girls could play with and carry them.

 Now they are three weeks old and have their feathers.  Mark is almost done with the chicken coop.  He really wanted to build one himself, and to sell me on the idea he said it would be cheaper.  No, it wasn't.  But he's had a good time...I think. 

Wildlife West Nature Park

On Saturday we went out to Edgewood to the Wildlife West Nature Park.  Every Saturday in the summer they have a chuckwagon dinner.  The admission includes the park, dinner, hayrides, and a birds of prey show.  We wanted to do this all summer but had to wait until I felt up to it.  Kendra loves the peregrine falcon, it's her favorite bird, so we couldn't wait to see the show.

The girls posing with the peregrine falcon.  The guy is actually an expert on peregrine falcons and helped rescue them from extinction.

 This bird flew down from his perch and scared Kendra.

 This bird kept pecking at Megan.

Great Horned Owl. 

We were only able to see the birds of prey and the show.  By the time dinner rolled around we were all starving.  There were close to 300 people there and it just so happened, with the way they split us to line up for dinner, that we were one of the last.  I wasn't so thrilled about that and neither were the girls.  So we didn't end up eating until about 8:00 pm.  We did get to meet two Vietnam Veterans in line so that was cool.  After dinner we left early because it was so late.  On our way out someone asked if we were able to see the park, we answered no.  She then gave us free passes to come back!  Worth the trip right there.

Vaccines

Before this year we were allowed, here in New Mexico, to have a personal exemption regarding vaccinations.  Last month the law changed and now you must have either a medical exemption or religious exemption - where you don't use medical care, just prayers for healing. 

So I have decided it's time to vaccinate my kids so they can attend public school.  I knew this day would come - when the government would take away my personal choice. 

Today was the day when I decided to take them in for a nurse's visit for their first round.  I told the girls they could have a krispy kreme doughnut and chocolate milk if they didn't cry.  I thought that would be rewarding enough but I was wrong...way wrong.  Kendra began to cry even before the nurse was in the room.  She clung to Mark and screamed hysterically.  And she didn't even get the shots yet.  This is all before.  During the shots she was worse and she sobbed for some time after.  Really?  Really?  I wish I could've taken a video of her because her behavior was just so unreal.  I don't even know how to describe it.  Then it was Megan's turn.  She was fine, just cried a little after it was done.  Perhaps it was seeing Kendra in her hysterical state that set her off.  But a few tears and she was done.  I am taking them in each month for shots and so help me she better not act like that again!

Let It Go

Sometimes I have dreams about playing sports in high school.  Last night I dreamt I was playing volleyball and I kept yelling at a girl, "why'd you do it?"  That is what sparked this post.

In an Indiana Jones movie, I think the Last Crusade, he goes to a temple on the side of a cliff and has to find Christ's goblet.  The temple then crumbles.  As Indiana hangs on for life with his father holding on to one hand he reaches for the goblet with the other.  His father says something like, "Indiana, let it go."  He chose to grab onto his father with both hands and was lifted to safety.  Had he continued to reach for the goblet he would've fallen to his death.

Years ago I was wronged and had every right to hate someone.  It's a beautiful story, but I won't share it here.  I chose to let go of the hate, anger, and pain I felt.  It was actually the Atonement that allowed me to let go.  I didn't realize how something so simple as forgiveness could impact someone's life down the road.  Years later I did something that was lifting to this person.  I realized I could have ruined her life, but instead she was lifted.  All because of a simple decision to forgive.  I'm glad I let go.  I felt so light and happy after I did.  Hate and anger are very enticing emotions, very strong and intense.  I choose happiness.

Now fast forward to today.  I think this person has a lot of pain and anger inside of her.  She can't forgive the people who have hurt her.  I wish I could say to her, "let it go."

First Day of School

I was so sad to send Kendra back to school already.  She's just so cute and sweet and I love her being home with me. 

So excited to go!!!

Posing with sister.  Megan helped sissy carry her supplies.

 This has nothing to do with the first day of school.  Megan is so funny and she often looks at me like this.  This mad little irritated face. 

 We harvested some corn from our garden.  I still have "country moments."  I'm like, " okay you shuck the corn outside and then feed the leaves to the cows."  Right?  That is what I did growing up.  Here in the city you just do it in the garbage.  I love how serious the girls took this job.

Best Movie Clip Ever

This movie clip makes me laugh.    When I watched the movie I rewound this clip several times.  Enjoy.

Fetal Heartbeat

I had a doctor appointment this week.  I'm shy of 16 weeks by a couple of days.  It was like any normal visit except he couldn't find the baby's heartbeat.  So at first I wasn't worried, but as he continued to try my mind began to race of what that meant.  I mean, not finding a heartbeat at 9 weeks is common, but at 16 weeks?!?!?  My doctor could tell I was anxious so he brought in an ultrasound machine.  Mark had decided to take some flex time to go to the appointment with me.  I was so glad he was there, I didn't want to go through that alone.  Done that already.  With the ultrasound we could see the heart beating and baby was moving.  He said the size of baby was consistent with my week so all is well.   

Twinners

Everyone says our kids look alike so here are some pics.  Megan at 3, then Kendra at 3.  At birth they looked identical, but they look different to me now.